Testimonial with Sofia

We have borderline. We are not borderline. 

Having borderline is like sinking in cold water at times but it does not define me or anyone.

I've always known I was different. It started with the constant crying and feeling helpless when I was only 3 years old. It grew and by the age of 4 I was already punishing myself because I thought I deserved it. I would hit myself with objects. By the age of 7, I was carving sharpened crayons onto my skin and started cutting when I was only 9. 

It only got worse and worse. The memories of the bloody school books still haunt me. I first attempted when I was 16. 

I've been hospitalized in a psychiatry ward 8 times. 

In 2024 I've been to the hospital to get stitches more than 10 times. I was hospitalized twice for 3rd degree self-harm burns. 

It's hard to explain to someone who doesn't have borderline what it is like to have it. At times is like feeling nothing at all, you are half dead; other times is like screaming but not being heard by anyone; It is like being left alone in the rain; 

Having borderline is like sinking in cold water at times but it does not define me or anyone. We have borderline. We are not borderline.